Sally O'Malley

Once in awhile I come across something that really makes me laugh. I love how Sally keeps pulling up her red pants. I can't wait to turn 50 so that I can KICK!

Angry Esther

Last Saturday Lauren told me that she had two messages on her phone from a woman named "Esther." Here is what the message said:(imagine strong southern accent.)

"Hey Steve, this is Esther. Uh my watah heatah is broke an' I ain't gonna wait no week or two for Y'ALL to come to fix the hot watah."

I did what any nice person would do. I called Esther to tell her that she had misdialed and left a message by mistake on my daughter's cell phone. I thought Esther would really like to reach the person who could fix her watah heatah. Here is how the conversation went after Esther answered the phone.

"Don't you call me agin you !#@*! I'm a 53 year old woman in my kitchen and I don't need nobody callin' my house. I didn't call your daughter and I don't get no texting on my telephone."

I couldn't believe that this woman flew into such a rage over my phone call. I told her that there was no reason to get so upset. I was just trying to be helpful. Then guess what she said?

"If you call my house one more time (as if I had called multiple times) I'm gonna come over and wup yo *#$!" Then she hung up on me.

There was nothing left for me to do but just laugh. I was in shock over the horrible language she had yelled into my ear. My kids were loving the drama of it all. Before we could block her number from Lauren's phone, Esther left another message. She said:

"Hey Steve, this is Esther you need give me a call back 'cause some crazy woman keep callin' mah house and I don't know who this woman is but she bettah stop callin' mah house like this. I don't know why she keep callin' me and I don't have no text messagin' on mah telephone. So you needa be callin' me back!"

It makes me sad that this woman lives such an angry life. But I don't think I'll call her back again to tell her that. My ear still feels violated.

Kid History - Episode 2

Please go watch this right now. You will laugh and smile. There is also a first and third episode. They are equally hysterical! They are on youtube under kid history. I don't know what these movies mean...they just make me laugh and miss my little ones.

Best Lasagna Ever

When you are trying to decide what to make for dinner this week...try this lasagna. It was so good! I got it from http://www.thepioneerwoman.com/. I love most of her recipes and her tutorials are hilarious. The crash hot potatoes are a real favorite in my house too.

Ingredients
■1-½ pound Ground Beef
■1 pound Hot Breakfast Sausage
■2 cloves Garlic, Minced
■2 cans (14.5 Ounce) Whole Tomatoes
■2 cans (6 Ounce) Tomato Paste
■2 Tablespoons Dried Parsley
■2 Tablespoons Dried Basil
■1 teaspoon Salt
■3 cups Lowfat Cottage Cheese
■2 whole Beaten Eggs
■½ cups Grated (not Shredded) Parmesan Cheese
■2 Tablespoons Dried Parsley
■1 teaspoon Salt
■1 pound Sliced Mozzarella Cheese
■1 package (10 Ounce) Lasagna Noodles
■(add 1/2 Teaspoon Salt And 1 Tablespoon Olive Oil To Pasta Water)
Preparation Instructions
Bring a large pot of water to a boil.
Meanwhile, in a large skillet or saucepan, combine ground beef, sausage, and garlic. Cook over medium-high heat until browned. Drain half the fat; less if you’re feeling naughty. Add tomatoes, tomato paste, 2 tablespoons parsley, basil and salt. After adding the tomatoes, the sauce mixture should simmer for 45 minutes while you are working on the other steps.
In a medium bowl, mix cottage cheese, beaten eggs, grated Parmesan, 2 more tablespoons parsley, and 1 more teaspoon salt. Stir together well. Set aside. Cook lasagna until “al dente” (not overly cooked).
To assemble:
Arrange 4 cooked lasagna noodles in the bottom of a baking pan, overlapping if necessary. Spoon half the cottage cheese mixture over the noodles. Spread evenly. Cover cottage cheese with a layer of mozzarella cheese. Spoon a little less than half the meat/sauce mixture over the top.

Repeat, ending with meat/sauce mixture. Sprinkle top generously with extra Parmesan.

Either freeze, refrigerate for up to two days, or bake immediately: 350-degree oven for 20 to 30 minutes, or until top is hot and bubbly.

Pioneer Trek Poster

I was given the assignment to create a poster for our upcoming Pioneer Handcart Trek this Spring. Thanks to the great and talented Mr. Stoner, the task was finally accomplished! This baby will go up in at least 2 of our church buildings tomorrow. I'm hoping the youth will be excited!

Puzzles

We like puzzles. Lauren requested that we get a 2,000 piece puzzle for Christmas and work on it over the holiday break. I picked out this beautiful castle. It is the Neuschwanstein Castle in Bavaria. Everyone was really excited at first. We all took turns working on it. Then...it got really hard. There are so many greens, blues, and mountain pieces. It's also been really annoying because it is taking up half of our dining table. I want it gone! I am over doing the puzzle. It is now January 10th. This puzzle is taking so much longer than I thought it would. Poor Mr. Stoner has been the only one consistently trying to complete the beast. Lesson learned: a 2,000 piece puzzle is too big!

Mr. Stoner has every piece neatly laid out. He's very methodical. I'm just hoping we can all sit comfortably at our table very soon.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from all of us!

The rolls are baked, ham is in the oven,

strawberry pretzel jello in the fridge,

cheesy potatoes prepared, and fresh

green beans ready to boil.

All of the presents are wrapped

and it's only 4:30 p.m. on Christmas Eve.

This is a miracle!